Now that I'm a mother using the bathroom has turned into a well orchestrated event complete with a tag team partner, 2 bottles of milk and some fruit snacks. (Who Knew??)
Using the Toilet (#1 or #2)
First off do not, I repeat DO NOT announce to anyone under the age of 8 that you are going to use the toilet. This announcement seems to activate all children. Either they want to join you or they plan to make some sort of mess while you are handling your business. My strategy is simple. When I feel to use the toilet for any reason I quietly sneak out the room, open the door as quietly as possible, handle my business and flush only after I wash my hands and on the way out. Even the sound of the toilet flushing seems to lure the little people. If I'm unable to sneak away and the kids follow me to the toilet, I simply bribe them with some sort of snack. Usually this stops the banging on the door or the little fingers pushing under the door.
Shower Time
Now when it comes to taking a shower unless the kids are out the house, your shower time is cut down to about 5-10 minutes top. (Washing your hair is a luxury). The perfect plan for taking a shower without the kids coming in to ask you 1 million questions is to use the tag team system. One parent showers while the other watches the kids and prepares their bottles for bed. Once your done, dress as quickly as possible and tag you husband/wife in. While they are taking a shower you can finally lotion your skin and give the kids their bottles. For you single parents, you just gotta bath after the kids fall asleep or risk having your brown living room couch painted with baby diaper rash cream.
If all else fails you can wear a diaper and shower the same time your kids shower.
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