Check List

When Tonio was diagnosed with Autism at 13 months I was overwhelmed at first. I wanted to make sure he had the best help whether it be at home or in school. 

As he grew up we faced many challenges and fought through every single one of them as a team. I actually push Tonio the hardest out of all three kids because I know he needs that extra push. I'm more attentive to his needs/wants, but I'm also more strict when it comes to him. Come to think of it my own mother treated me this same way. I don't have Autism (Maybe some other mental disorder though). But I know for sure I have MIDDLE CHILD SYNDROME.

I had to learned how to incorporate things into our daily life that will help Tonio have a productive day. One of the most important tools I use everyday is his "MORNING CHECK LIST".

I realized our morning routines where more of me yelling at kids while I run around the house in a towel, one sock and my make-up half done. Realizing that Anthony is old enough to take care of his own morning routine and Ari just goes with the follow, I knew that I need to help Tonio become more productive and independent. Getting him focused on one task in the morning was hard. So one day I sat down and complied a list of the most important things that he most complete in the morning. Once the list was made I printed it out and hung it up in the kids room.

Tonio's Check List

1. Wake Up

2. Pee, Brush teeth, Wash your face

3. Take off your pj's and place them under your pillow

4. Put on Vest, Socks, Uniform pants, Uniform shirt

5. Eat Breakfast (No Ipad, No Iphone)

6. Pack school lunch/snacks in your bookbag

7. Lotion hands, Face

8. Put on Glasses

9. Put on Shoes

10. Put on coat

11. Free Time until Mommy is ready to leave

Now the rules are simple. He is not allowed to engage in any other activities, conversations (unless it has to do with the check list) until he has completed his check list. Like I stated before, I am more hard on him but I also try to make things more easy for him. So, instead of yelling at him to get dress, finish eating his food, or to pack his bag all you hear from me is "TONIO CHECK LIST". By now I don't even have to know where he is on his check list during the morning because he is doing a great job. And if I see he is going off course I just remind him "TONIO CHECKLIST". He is more focused in the morning and I yell about 25% less. "Who Knew"  

Maybe we all need a check list to help us out during the day. And when find ourselves going off course then you can  just  yell out "CHECK LIST". LOL

Anthony Checklist

1. Get up

2. TAKE A SHOWER

3. BRUSH MY TEETH

4. TAKE ANOTHER SHOWER 

5. Iron clothes

6. Show mom

7. Iron them again

8. Brush hair

9. Show mom

10. Brush hair again

11. Pack book bag

12. Put on shoes

13. Pack book bag again

14. Make sure I have my keys, wallet

15. Ask mom for money

16. Leave for school

Ariana Checklist

1. Wake up

2. Use the potty

3. Brush my teeth

4. Go back in my bed until mommy is ready for me

5. Take off my PJ’s 

6. Put on my Uniform

7. Watch Dora until Mommy is ready to leave

Mommy Check List

1. Wake up

2. Say a pray

3. Meditate

4. Yell at Kids

5. Bath

6. Yell at kids

7. Put on clothes

8. Try not to drink WINE

9. Yell at kids to leave

10. Drink some Tea, not wine

11. Go to work

1.       

1

Mom I can't find the car.

If you are a parent then you have definitely heard this line before "MOM I CAN'T FIND IT."

The line heard around the world. The line that causes your eyes to roll to the back of your head. The line that causes you to put down your glass of wine, throw on your robe and catch an instant head ache the moment you go to the exact location and find the exact object the child just  said they couldn't find ."WHO KNEW".

Just like the washing machine loses your socks, kids seem to misplace things and expect you to find it. Or we put something down in the house and send our kids to retrieve it only for them to say "Mom I can't find it." This happens to me at least once a day in my house. Now I'm at the point where I don't even ask anyone to find something for me, and if they loss a toy, book, remote it just stays LOST.

But what do you do when you send your child to look for something like the family car and he comes back and tells you "Mom I can't find the car"? Here is my story.

Monday morning 10/16/17.
After a long weekend of shopping, eating out and birthday/baby shower celebrations everyone gave me hell to wake up Monday morning.  After driving around my neighborhood for an hour the night before I finally found a park around the corner. In my effort to get inside the house quickly so I can get everyone to bed I forgot to take Ari's Ipad and Tonio's Iphone and glasses out of the car. It's only when I finally got into bed Sunday night did I realize that I left those items in the car. I made a mental note to self that in the morning I will send Anthony out to get the stuff from the car. Now, Anthony (High Schooler) has done this before so I didn't put any thought into asking him to do it again. By 7:15 Am he is downstairs ready to go. I stop him before he leaves and tell him to run around the corner and get the stuff out the car. This should only take about 5-6 mins and then he can be on his way. He takes the car keys and heads out the door. By this time the other two kids are almost ready for school and I'm packing lunch bags in the kitchen. About 15 mins pass and I realized I haven't heard from Anthony so I call his phone. When he answers I ask him what is taking so long and he says "Mom, I couldn't find the car but I left the keys by the door and I'm heading to school. At this point my stomach starts to turn into knots, the vein in my forehead begins to throb and I start to panic. But I also have to stay calm because I have two small little humans that can't see Mommy sweat. They are watching and taking mental notes on how to BREAK ME DOWN and I will NOT give the enemy aka my children any ammo.

Coming out of my panic, I start to rush around the house finishing up my morning duties. All the while trying to figure out WHERE THE FUCK IS MY CAR. Did someone steal it? Was it Towed? I know I was tired and in a rush, but I'm always responsible when it comes to parking my car.

Finally I get the kids out the door. Now we usually head right towards everyone's school but I need to find out what happened to the car so we head left. This throws my kids for a loop and they begin to ask questions. Why we going this way? This is not the way we go? Are we going to school?
KEEP CALM ALICIA, is all I keep telling myself. I don't want to tell them that the car is missing so I just say I need to check on something. As we near the corner, my hands begin to clam up, and now I'm break out into a cold sweat. All the while Ari and Tonio are skipping and singing songs of merry cheer. We turn the corner and I close my eyes and open it slow....BOOM. THE FUCKING CAR IS SITTING IN THE SAME EXACT PLACE I PARKED IT. Still not breaking my cool, I retrieve the Ipad, Iphone place it in my bag, put Antonio's glasses on his head (which by the way he lost later that afternoon) lock  the door, check the parking sign and then proceed to drop everyone to school.

Not wanting to take all these electronics to work I make a quick detour back home to drop off the items and that's when it hits me. I literally had to sit down and gather my thoughts because all I wanted to do was go to Anthony's school, and drop kick him. He probably walked out the house, realized it was cold, said Forget this and came back home.

Moral of this story.... Don't ask your children to look for the car.

The LUNCH BOX.

The dreaded BACK TO SCHOOL shopping.

Now, this should be a simple task right??? But of course GOD likes to laugh at me so he always seems to put me in these crazy situations. School shopping would be made easy if I had a few helpful things to help me along the way. For example.....A LIST OF SCHOOL SUPPLIES BEFORE SCHOOL OPENS. Yeah teachers, that would be nice. Anywho, with out this list I'm stuck in Target spinning around with 2 packs of pencils and 4 notebooks hoping this might be on their list when I finally get it. But that's another topic we will discuss later.

I've been doing this back to school shopping for over 13 years so I figure as long as I get the basics all will be right in the world. (Who Knew?) Now the basics consist of Pens, Pencils, Notebooks, Folders, Crayons, and the LUNCH BOX. But how is it that out of all the things I buy every year I dread the LUNCH BOX??? Well simple, that's because before the 10 month school year is over I end up buying over 387 lunch boxes. 😘😘

I really don't get it. How do you continue to lose a lunch box?? Where do they go???
Even after countless hours of me calling the school and even searching through lost and found I could never seem to find the missing LUNCH BOX.  So this year I decided to do things differently. I bought 1 lunch box and when you lose it, you lose it. I will not continue to contribute the LUNCH BOX Matrix.

Tonio lost his lunch box only 3 days into the new school year and I found the perfect solution.

This plastic bag is very versatile.
It can hold up to 10 items, keeps the juice cold, and can be tossed into the trash when the child is done. Plus he gets to choose a new bag everyday.

I'm recycling and also helping the fight against the LUNCH BOX MATRIX.

SUNDAY FUNDAY

During the week I run a tight ship at home. Up by 6:30am, out the door by 7:50am, Dinner by 7pm and everyone goes to bed by 8:30pm. So by Friday night I let my hair down and allow the kids to be free. This includes McDonald's every Friday (which can be eaten anywhere except the bedrooms), and allowing the kids to watch TV or play on there Ipads, game consoles until their eyes bug out.  


Saturdays are for cleaning and running errands. This must always include a trip to Target. We, I mean I always need something from Target. (Who Knew?)


Sunday's is GET YOUR LIFE TOGETHER day. This day we make sure all homework, book reports are done and most importantly the dreaded LAUNDRY. I wash the younger kids clothes and my older son is responsible for washing his own clothes. I have a minimum of 2 loads per child, which should only take about 1 1/2 hour to wash, especially being that I have a washing machine in my basement.


This has been my routine for the past 10 years, but EVERY SUNDAY I  can't seem to get it RIGHT.


Every Sunday I wake up with a purpose and that is to Wash the kids clothes by 12pm, cook dinner, take a nap and watch TV. THIS NEVER HAPPENS.


I'm up by 8am and cook a nice breakfast for the kids. While they are eating I make up the beds and sort their laundry. By 10am they are finished eating and I clean up the mess that they make. So, far so good RIGHT??? I make sure everyone changes their clothes and I hit the basement with my basket full of clothes in hand. So by 11am I have my first load washing and LIFE SEEMS GREAT.


I go back upstairs and this is where everything goes LEFT...By the time I reach back upstairs there is Jello on the couch, playdoh on the tv, apple juice on the floor, Ari is missing a sock and looking for her pacifier, Tonio is crying because Just Dance keeps freezing and Anthony is no where in sight. After getting everyone back on track and the place cleaned back up its now 4pm, I still have 3 more loads of clothes to wash, we are all hungry and I just end up taking a nap.